I was waiting at the metro stop when a man got off the train. His pants were wet, and then he just stood there and made them even more wet, and an almighty puddle formed around him.
Then he very theatrically raised his arms in the air, dropped down right over the tracks, and draped himself artistically across them. For a moment, there was no reaction, cause everyone else was on their phones. Slowly, they started noticing. “Bro! You okay? Bro, I got you! Bro, you gotta climb out of there.”
Well, “Bro” didn’t feel like doing that, instead started walking drunkenly up and down the tracks.
“Bro, a train’s coming!”
Finally, another guy decided enough was enough and jumped down onto the tracks and started chasing “Bro” to get him out of there. Bro wouldn’t cooperate. So there were now two people running around on the tracks. And then finally the train did come, and the second man wrapped both his arms around the drunk with wet pants to hold him back. The train was hardly bothered — it slowed down, but never actually came to a complete stop (as you might think to do when you see people on the tracks), until it was going to stop anyways because it was in position by the platform.
Then, the train didn’t even wait for the hero who’d saved the drunk to have time to board. Out of all of us, he was the only one to miss the train.
So is the Los Angeles metro safe? Just keep in mind, if you see someone on the tracks, and you go and try to save them, the trains are going to care just as little about your life and well-being as they care about the person’s who you went to save.
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